Author: Jim Gohrick (Page 2 of 147)

I’ll be the first one to say that more times than not, I can benefit from hearing the hard truth. The facts. Being blunt. No frills.

Even I’m smart enough to know that I will sugar-coat the truth to myself to save my ego and justify my efforts.

This is where we can all benefit from someone in your inner circle who can give it to you straight. Maybe they’re not in your inner circle. Maybe they’re a business colleague or even a stranger. It really doesn’t matter. The question is: can you take it? I hope it’s in me to do so. I hope it’s in you to do so.

Why? Because we can all benefit from the truth if we want real change for the better.

I find it challenging to summon up the power of ‘why‘ while I’m striving for my goal/s in order to carry my motivation from the first of the year deep into the fiery bowels of late fall into December carrying as much fervor with me as I did on January 2nd.

I understand that we do things for two reasons: the carrot or the stick. Pain or pleasure. In the past, I never wanted to entertain the idea of doing something because of anger or pain. I didn’t want to entertain the thoughts of those low energy emotions. I wanted to choose a higher energy such as Love. But, the truth of the matter is this; We will do more to avoid pain than we will to gain pleasure. I have many examples of that in my life. I will do more to avoid pain. And for me, the regret of not doing something is a powerful motivator.

There are past experiences that haunt me to this day where I know deep within me I didn’t give 100% effort and because of that I came up short of reaching my intended goal. But for me, it wasn’t so much about reaching that goal as it was the effort I gave. I knew I could have given more.

That’s enough for me to reassess where my fears are located and square-up to each and every one. I don’t want to live my life with the pain of regret in my heart. That hurts too much.

I’m not really even sure what this means. I believe I do when it comes to facts. As a fact is still a fact – even today. On the other hand, when it comes to our perspective, it becomes a bit more complicated.

The reason is because of our perception of what is true or real. Or even present in the moment. It’s our mind’s way of trying to protect us, but we can miss vital information that will prevent us from evolving. This is called ‘Selective Perception.’ That’s why I want to pull on this thread.

Selective Perception is when our mind filters what we don’t want to hear or see – for whatever reason. So, it leads us to only see a fraction of the truth and not what is actually real. Essentially, it’s choosing to believe what you want to believe is true. Not actually true.

For me, this is no way to go through my day. I would rather see the world in an unbiased way and make my decisions from that truth. Wouldn’t you?

Why is it that the moment our sought after goal and/or endeavor is realized, we completely forget the road we traveled to get there and maybe more importantly, how we felt along the way.

Let me explain; It seems rather easy to forget how we felt when we were struggling and striving for that hard-earned goal, when remembering what we were thinking and how we were feeling could be the greatest teaching tool in our ability to gain wisdom.

If you want to go even deeper – to quote the late Kobe Bryant after missing the last shot to win the game when a reporter asked him how he feels about not making it – “How I feel has nothing to do with it. I need to answer the question ‘why’ I missed the shot. I’ve answered that question. Now I know why and I can get to work on it.”

Kobe took a little different spin on it, but all the same. He knows what it takes to get the results he wants.

I would say, we can learn a lot by remembering where our head was while we were in the thick of our struggles. This is a great teaching tool to mark your progress and more importantly, the lessons we learned.

Maybe, just maybe there’s one day out of the year we can choose to change our perspective to one of human kindness, Love, patience and gratitude.

Maybe, just maybe we can drop all of our resentment, fear, worries, and tightly held presumptions we may or may not have and choose to give others the benefit of the doubt. Maybe even bring some joy to their lives.

Maybe, just maybe there’s a day we can see others as an opportunity to give something of value we have away to others. Maybe it’s not money or gifts. Maybe it’s just a “hello,” or “happy holidays.” It could be a smile that connects two human beings to let them know they’re not alone.

Maybe. Maybe Christmas is the perfect time.