Can we be okay with where we are in this moment? Knowing the endless lists that need to be addressed. Can we allow all of our future expectations, fears and past mistakes to pass – to dissolve and just embrace this moment for what it is? I think so.

It may take a bit of mental work – or maybe it’s just as easy as making a decision to let go. It could be as easy as having the self-awareness to realize nothing is ever going to be perfect in our lives. That’s part of of it.

The truth is there is nothing binding us to our past mistakes no more than we are bound to unresolved conversations or projects in the future. We have the power within us to cut ourselves free from the guilt of unattained goals and frustration and anxiety that comes with future plans.

We may be EXACTLY where we need to be in this moment. And if we’re not, telling ourselves as much may not be a bad idea either. Because the truth is this: we ARE EXACTLY where we need to be. Why? Because that’s where we are and hoping/wishing to be somewhere else only makes us anxious.

Sam Harris has a wonderful metaphor about how to handle where we are mentally and emotionally when the waves of life crash around us. We can either be in the “strike zone” or we can choose to move into a position where the wave moves under us with little to know damage to ourselves.

This is such a great lesson for allowing our thoughts and emotions to not get the best of us by choosing our perspective of the situation.

We can choose to put ourselves in a position where we’re going to feel the impact or we can choose otherwise.

But ultimately, it’s up to us.

I’ve always liked the idea of setting a goal for something you want to accomplish and then working backwards from there in order to make the necessary changes in your day to day life in order to achieve it.

Maybe it’s the simplification of our activities or the fact that my ADD can make sense of the tasks when broken down. Whatever the case may be, it feels attainable.

For example, if I set the goal of writing a book of 200 pages by the end of the year, then I’m going to have to write 400 words a day, five days a week in order to accomplish that goal (more or less). This will take about 1-2 hours a day. Am I able to do this? Sounds feasible to me.

Because it’s broken down into daily tasks I don’t feel overwhelmed and am able to climb one stair at a time on the giant staircase to the clouds I call my goal.

No matter how often it happens, when another person gives me the benefit of the doubt or places high expectations on me with the intention of having me rise to the occasion, it would seem I always do. Or at least have the desire to.

I’m not sure why this is the case. Human nature, I guess. It seems to be most surprising to me when coming from an absolute stranger. In these cases, my desire to rise up and exceed their expectations is even greater.

For me, it’s a moment where I can show them I can handle the fragility of trust they’re giving me and reciprocate with an act of unselfishness as well.

That certainly gives me a shot of dopamine and more. I’ll take that any day. Especially by getting it from connecting with others and not from social media.

The older I get on in age it seems the more I value relationships with people I enjoy. There are always several qualities in people that I’m attracted to such as: humility, kindness, people who are soft-spoken, humor – they have to be funny or they’re gone! Respectful, creative, honest, trust-worthy, unselfish, open-minded and very good listeners. It also helps if they’re outdoorsy and athletic, but I don’t want to be too judgmental.

The thing is, when I find these people, I don’t let them go and I certainly let them know how wonderful they are. I don’t hold back on how much our relationship means to me and why I value them. I find myself going above and beyond with my kindness and sometimes gifts in order to show my appreciation. that feels really good to me.

I’ve also done this with my wife and children – not nearly enough – and am so grateful I have and continue to do. These ‘gushes’ may come in the form of notes, cards, letters or texts letting them know how much I appreciate, Love and value them and why. As difficult as it is to summon the energy to put those words onto paper – telling myself, “you don’t have to do this. They know.” I never regret doing it. In fact, it only solidifies our Love for one another even more. Every single time.

That will never get old for me.