Month: January 2021 (Page 1 of 3)

Do you have to have a master’s degree, a best-selling book or sold “X” amount of albums to be legitimate – to be a force – to be heard? I’m not sure. My instincts tell me no.

I have seemed to pick up extremely valuable advice and tidbits of gold that I have been able to apply quite successfully in many different aspects of my life from “regular ole folk.” It resonated with me, so I kept it. And used it. It meant something. I was able to mentally articulate it so that it made sense to me.

Maybe I asked this question because there is a part of me that believes you do need a degree. Then again, the areas of my life where I have the deepest well of knowledge has come from living life. Not a piece of paper or a target number or any other accolade.

It’s a perspective I’ve gained by committing to the process. Caring. Refining. Growing. And Loving.

Deciding to evolve.

Most people look better with a smile on their face. Not a disingenuous one, but a smile that says, “I’m in a good place, a willing participant and aware of the big picture – we’re all in this together.”

This doesn’t necessarily mean they are happy in that moment, but they wear it knowing it’s one part of a series of choices they make in order to get the perspective they want in life. Nothing wrong with that.

For whatever reason people choose to wear a smile, I’m alright with it. When I see someone walking down the street with a big grin on their face, I think they must know something I don’t know. And what is it?

Because I wouldn’t mind having that look on my face.

It seems to me that everyone believes they know EXACTLY how tomorrow is going to go. Even if they don’t have their day all scheduled out. I believe we all kid ourselves because we are terrified of the unknown. I certainly have been in the past. It’s something I work on daily. Part of it for me is doing my best to stay present in the moment without trying to “steer”my day into a particular direction. As the old saying goes, “Make plans and then watch God laugh at them.”

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not talking about pessimism. I’m referring to allowing each moment to come to you exactly the way it needs to. But, always expect the best. Some will argue that in order to get what you want you have to “take the bull by the horns” and make it happen. I hear that. There is nothing wrong with self-motivation, perseverance, tenacity and effort. What I’m saying is, keep your intentions clear and true and move forward the best way you know possible. Whatever is going to happen after that is going to happen. Just because you think you are controlling every aspect of your day and all the moving parts – that are completely out of your control – doesn’t mean you are.

So, as they say, “Let go and let God”. Or whoever or whatever allows you to cut yourself loose from the binding ties of anxiety, stress and worry. I tell my kids all the time, if I thought it would help to resolve your problem by laying in your bed and crying all night, then do it. But it doesn’t. And you shouldn’t. Let it go into the unknown. There is power in letting go. It frees you up and empowers you to move forward and it allows the universe to bring you what’s next. And in my experience it’s not as bad as your mind creates it to be.

My goal is to live in the unknown all day. I believe the unknown is where the really good creative stuff comes from. The blackness of the unknown.

Here, anything can be the gateway to everything.

Silence is a precious commodity these days. I don’t think people get enough of it and what is maybe more concerning is they’re not even seeking it out. I have heard it is the space between the bars that holds the tiger in the cage and it is the silence between the notes that help make up the music. If that is true, how are we to process this constant noise in our daily lives with no end in sight? My guess is, not very well.

A friend of mine once entered an anechoic chamber to see how long he could remain in there in absolute silence (It is a room within a room used for testing products and other experiments). It is so quiet that the background noise measured at negative -9 dBA. You can hear your heart beating, your stomach gurgling and even your lungs. He lasted 15 minutes and he though he was going crazy for the first 5-10.

We’re not used to sitting in silence. We’ve been convinced that we need the TV on in the background, our AirPods in our ears while we run or talking incessantly while out in nature. Maybe not. Try turning these devices off, opening your window and listen. You may be pleasantly surprised at what you hear.

More importantly, you may be surprised at what you don’t hear.

There is nothing inherently wrong with judgement. As I understand it to mean, it is forming an opinion about something or someone. The latter is what I want to focus on. In today’s world, “judgement” is a pretty nasty word. With social media in full throttle we are able to form opinions about others quite often throughout the day and be able to post those opinions or judgements for others to see. Quite often by the person we are judging. And much of these “evaluations” are negative. It’s fairly risk-free to write less than stellar remarks about someone behind the anonymity of a computer/device screen.

I believe fear is one of the reasons people engage in that type of activity. Fear can take many forms: jealousy, resentment, hatred, anger, anxiety, stress, worry, doubt and on and on. There is a never-ending list which I will not get into any further. And for me, fear is a choice. Not the type of fear you feel when you’re standing on the edge of a 50 story building, but the type of fear you choose to indulge in because you are more uncomfortable and it takes a greater effort to build someone up rather than tear them down. It’s a shortcut. It’s like shot of morphine in the arm (not that I’ve ever done that). It’s a quick fix. And we become addicted to that response to the point where we don’t even know we’re doing it.

The opposite of fear is Love. That takes courage and it is a choice as well. Believe you me, I don’t choose that path every time, but when I do, I never regret it.

Always choose Love. Always.