My understanding of the resolution to this topic is not simplistic by any means nor is there only one way to heal. However, I believe there are some basic elements to healing in which we can all benefit from.
I have always been a believer in moving through the issue your faced with rather than skirting around it or sweeping it under the rug. This is never a healthy way of getting on the other side. We must be honest with ourselves that we are indeed dealing with the wound (emotionally) and not just saying we are. Time does not heal all wounds. It kicks the can down the road. Until you’re ready to deal with them.
We must dive into the pain we feel, acknowledge it, identify where it’s coming from, remove ourselves from being exposed to it again (if possible) and move forward. These are the first steps.
I’m also a big proponent of discussing the topic with someone who is trained in such matters. Mind you, this should not be the only place where you reconcile your pain. Loved ones who are looking out for your best interest can shine light on the subject matter by sharing their perspective and life experiences.
There is no wrong way of healing – other than doing nothing. You will heal over time. Help yourself by gaining insight from your pain.
“The wound is the place where light enters you.”