Author: Jim Gohrick (Page 78 of 159)

Why is it so much easier to “go to bat” for others, but not for ourselves?

We tend to do more and tolerate less in order to protect others rather than ourselves. Why is that? Do we think we can handle it? Maybe. Maybe not.

We might just want to think about giving ourselves a bit of a break and throw some self-love our own way. It probably can’t hurt. I know it can’t.

One thing is for sure: Self-guilt, shame, ridicule and the like, does not inspire one to be the best version of themselves in life. Believe me. I’ve tried.

Instead, let’s give ourselves a break, recognize that we’re human beings doing the best we can and begin again with a fresh slate. Yes, we indeed may fall again, but having as many people in our corner lifting us up to rise again is wise.

This includes being our own best friend, fan, coach and leader. After all, you deserve a little Love from . . . you.

Let’s remember that we’re all human beings and we’re not perfect by nature. Therefore, all things are possible. Unfortunately, both in a good way and some times in a not-so-good way. So, getting offended by others’ actions shouldn’t be a surprise unless we’ve forgotten the basic principles.

Maybe if we can follow the 100-0 rule, we might see the world a bit different. We may be able to mitigate some – if not all of the pain we suffer from. Here is the rule: Give 100% effort expecting 0 in return.

This pretty much sets up our expectations right from the “get-go” without being unrealistic and/or disappointed.

How could you? Let me tell you: Because. It doesn’t matter if we’re looking for 0 in return anyway.

This way we can stop placing the blame on others and re-direct it within our circle of influence – our responsibility. That’s the healthy way.

That’s how we could . . . can and will. Thank you very much.

I realize this questions can sound confrontational right from the beginning – and often is under the context it’s used these days – but quite often we do get a bit too concerned about other people and what they’re doing. Hence, the question above.

Point being, we can always spend more time focusing on our own process and progress rather than distracting ourselves while getting into other people’s business.

Most of the time we do this to get out of facing our own issues, as it’s always easier to point our finger at other’s rather than admit to our own inadequacies. It’s even more challenging to not only admit to them, but to do something about it. Why? Because it’s much easier to NOT take responsibility for our own lives and continue to live out our lives as victims. Then we can blame the rest of the world and never have to be accountable for what we’re able to accomplish in life. Why? Because it’s the circumstances, other people, the world around us. It’s not us that’s the problem. It’s everyone/everything BUT us that’s the problem.

Hmm. How’s that working?

I imagine it’s working fine if that’s the type of life you intend to lead, but if you want a life of accountability and evolvement – a true growing of the self – then we have to take 100% responsibility for everything in our lives and stop worrying about what our neighbor is doing and/or thinking.

This is why I care.

Maybe it’s not the most idealistic way to slow down time, but I can guarantee you it will. Engage in an activity where you find yourself being challenged. Physically. Mentally. Emotionally. Or all of them.

For example, if you want to stretch out the next minute, get in a plank position and hold it. Maybe you want the next 30 to last, go run 4 miles. Or set your timer and sit down in front of your computer and write for 45 minutes.

Often, we can accomplish several goals, by addressing something we don’t want to do – because it’s not a quick fix, but an investment in yourself that has delayed gratification – and fully engaging in it.

The benefits are twofold: First you are doing your best to being present for every moment of the day as well as learning, growing and evolving in a task that is most likely beneficial to you as it’s not quick fix activity.

We can always pause before reacting between the stimulus and the response.

Even though we may feel under pressure or pushed for time – those are restrictions we put on ourselves that cause unneeded stress.

Let’s understand we create our own rhythm of life and we can decide to take a few deep breaths between activities, in transitions or in moments of high intensity to calm the waters and bring our levels back down to normal.

It takes practice though. But, no doubt has numerous benefits to our health in more ways than one.

So, let’s all: just breathe.